I have no idea how the book business works, so I can't explain why my book is being sold in these strange places

Does anyone here speak Danish??

As I've mentioned more than once (I apologize if it's getting annoying), I recently wrote a book. Like this blog it's called "5 Kids, 1 Wife," and it's a compilation of some of my favorite posts since 2011.

I published the book through Kindle Direct Publishing (KDP), which means it is available for purchase through Amazon. Between that and any copies I sell directly to people I know, I figured that was the extent of my potential sales channels.

But then, within days of the book coming out, it mysteriously showed up on BarnesandNoble.com. I couldn't explain how that happened, but I thought it was pretty cool.

Then I found the book popping up online in a dozen or so other places, many of which I wasn't even aware existed.

That's when I remembered I had agreed to take part in KDP's Expanded Distribution program, which they promise will "make your book available to distributors so booksellers and libraries can find your book and order it."

Here's what a simple Google search turns up:

• My book is more expensive on "Thrift" Books ($18.06) than it is on Amazon ($16).
  
  
• On the other hand, it's significantly discounted ($12.88) at Alibris.com.
  
  
• While we're on the subject of pricing, please please PLEASE do not buy it from this eBay seller for $30.82. If you find yourself tempted to do this, call me and I will give you a copy in order to save you from yourself.
  
  
• On the fun side, while the book is only available in English, you can buy it on websites on which the primary language is Danish, Swedish and German.
  
  
• There's a classical guitarist named Scott Tennant of whom I've been aware for several years. Authorship of my book is credited to him in a few places, including this site.

A question worth asking – at least as far as I'm concerned – is whether and how I get paid if someone buys my book from any of these people. Other than the eBay merchant, I'm assuming the other sites have some sort of arrangement through which they buy the book from Amazon/KDP and I still get my standard royalty, which is an admittedly small but symbolically important $3.42 per book.

I have no way of tracking this or confirming it's truly how the whole thing works, but I'm going to trust Andy Jassy (the president and CEO of Amazon) and his team to treat us small-time authors fairly.

Of course, as I describe in the book, I also once trusted a local panhandler named Maurice to pay back $80 I gave him, so this could be another case in which my enduring faith in humanity proves to be foolish.

The Amazon van makes frequent stops at our house

I registered for my Amazon.com account in 1999, the same year I also logged on to eBay for the first time.

If back then you would have asked me which of the two would have the biggest long-term impact on American shopping habits, I would have said eBay, hands down.

Amazon was, after all, primarily a place where you could get books and/or CDs. Or at least that's what my first several purchases were limited to.

eBay, on the other hand, offered everything. I would have assumed that, rather than brick-and-mortar retail stores, product manufacturers would just start putting their wares on eBay and selling through that model.

And many do, of course. This isn't to denigrate eBay at all. I still make a purchase or two per year there, particularly if it's a hard-to-find item.

But it's no Amazon. Nothing is Amazon except Amazon itself.

In many ways, Amazon has become Walmart, but in a much better way than Walmart was ever Walmart.

We have a huge Amazon distribution center near our house. There are times when I will order something and it gets here in far less than 24 hours, almost certainly because it was in stock at that facility in Euclid.

This is stunning to me, a person who grew up in the 70s and 80s when, if you ordered something by mail and were told it would arrive in 4 to 6 weeks, by gosh, they meant 4 to 6 weeks.

That perspective alone makes me appreciate the speed of Amazon transactions all the more.

I do understand there are legitimate concerns with Amazon, not the least of which is the threat it poses to local mom-and-pop businesses. And I really do try to patronize those businesses when they have what I need.

But the reality is that, thanks to its convenience and wide selection, Amazon has a devoted customer base within my house.

Like many people, we serve as a regular stop on the Amazon person's delivery route. We have a stockpile of Amazon boxes and envelopes.

It won't be long before Amazon will start delivering stuff before we even realize we need it. Then we'll know we're really in trouble.