Mel and me, circa 2004
It's also a day on which I wonder how helpful it is for our education system to brand some young kids as "gifted" and others not.
To explain...
When I was a student at Mapledale Elementary School back in the late 70s and early 80s, there was a point at which they separated some of us into an honors class. I don't know how they determined this, whether it was by test scores, subjective teacher evaluations, or a combination.
Whatever the criteria, those of us branded as "smart" were suddenly segregated from our classmates to experience a somewhat advanced curriculum designed for "gifted" students.
The "gifted" label stuck with us through the rest of our public schooling, for better or worse.
The better part of it, I suppose, was that thinking of myself as a smart kid gave me a confidence that was at times helpful and at other times wholly undeserved. Either way, I tried a lot of different things growing up because I figured that, as a gifted student, I would probably be good at them.
That was not usually the case. Not by a longshot.
The sobering part of being one of the smart kids is that, at some point later in life, you come to realize you're not necessarily any smarter than anyone else. Or at least I know I'm not.
I got to be in the honors classes not because of an elevated IQ or exceptional talent, but rather because of my chronic need to please and subsequent drive to study hard and meet expectations. I worked hard and got good grades, so they figured I must be smart. The jury is still out on that one.
So what does any of this have to do with Melanie?
Also Mel and me, also circa 2004
Mel did very well in school, but she was the only one of our kids who wasn't part of Wickliffe's "Above & Beyond" program for gifted students. Again, I don't know why her siblings got in and she didn't, and ultimately it probably doesn't matter.
One time, a friend of the family found out Mel was the one Tennant kid not in A&B and jokingly said to her, "Oh, so you're the dumb one?"
It was NOT helpful, and it was obviously untrue to anyone who knew our family at all.
Terry, especially, spent years working with Mel to boost her self-confidence. Mel is as smart and as capable as any of her brothers and sisters, "gifted" or not. Talk with her for 5 minutes and you'll realize how sharp she is.
All of which makes me wonder what "smart/gifted" really means for an 11-year-old, and whether we're doing more harm than good withholding that designation from kids who, over time, show themselves to be every bit the equal (or superior) of their supposedly advanced peers.
It all worked out in Melanie's case, and for that we're grateful. Happy birthday to my 26-year-old smart kid!
I also was identified as gifted in school and in high school was separated from the other kids. I don’t think it did me much good academically and certainly did not help me socially. Thanks for your interesting insights.
ReplyDeleteWhile I think it's helpful to support kiddos in school with curriculum tailored to their needs, the label "gifted" isn't helpful at all. We never really explain to kids what it means and, more importantly, what it doesn't mean. And once they are out of high school, life becomes an equalizer. All that said, yay for Melanie and supportive parents and happy birthday! May this be her best year yet!
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