This > That

Cabbage > Lettuce
Browns > Steelers
Stalactites > Stalagmites
Fall > Spring
Butter pecan > Mint chocolate chip (but not by much)
Fred Flintstone > Bugs Bunny (same)
Scotland > Ireland
Hockey > Any other sport
Analog clocks > Digital clocks
No tattoos > Tattoos (sorry)
80s music > 90s music
Push mower > Riding mower, BUT...
Snow blowing > Snow shoveling
White cats > Black cats
Showers > Baths
Vonnegut > Faulkner
Scratch-off lottery tickets > Casino games
Commodore 64 > Atari 400
Match Game > Joker's Wild
Thin Elvis > Fat Elvis
Paul > George > John > Ringo
My wife's beef stroganoff > Any other food item in the history of the universe
Coltrane > Your favorite musician
Clouds > No clouds
NHL playoffs > March Madness
Gold Circle > Zayre's
Sleeping with clothes on > Sleeping with clothes off
Pencils > Pens
Daphne > Velma (just as Veronica > Betty)
Canadian money > All other money
Coffee > No coffee
Pepsi > Coke
Mapledale > Worden > Lincoln (obscure Wickliffe reference alert!)
World Book Encyclopedia > Encyclopedia Brittanica
South Pole > North Pole
Washing > Drying > Putting away
Days when the mail is delivered > Days when the mail is not delivered
Skullet > Mullet
Clubber Lang > Ivan Drago
Scarecrow > Cowardly Lion > Tin Man
5,000-mile oil change > 3,000-mile oil change
Letterman > Leno
Facebook the old way > Facebook timeline
VH1 > MTV
Having daughters = Having sons