Monday, April 10, 2017

10 things I really should understand a lot better than I do

(1) Plumbing (or wiring, or heating and cooling, or virtually any other semi-complex system within my house)

(2) The economy

(3) Why airplanes don't just fall out of the sky. You can explain aerodynamics, air lift, wing shape and everything to me as much as you want. I still don't see why every jetliner I've ever been on was able to stay aloft for more than four seconds.

(4) How to read Shakespeare. I've tried. Believe me, I've tried. But when I come up against "Against the which, a moiety competent / Was gaged by our king; which had return'd / To the inheritance of Fortinbras, / Had he been vanquisher," I pretty much dissolve into a puddle of ignorance.

(5) How a saxophone, an instrument I've played since 1979, actually works.

(6) Bridge, Hearts, Spades and about 47 other popular card games

(7) How a baby actually emerges from a woman. I've watched it happen live and in person several times. And yet I still think it was all done with mirrors or CGI or something. I know the size of a newborn baby. And I know the size of the orifice from which it supposedly passes. The two don't match up in any way at all. I don't care what geometry you use, THAT ain't fittin' through THAT. So I want to know how they actually do it.

(8) Why accents exist (I mean linguistic accents. Not, you know, rugs.)

(9) Cricket (Again, to clarify, the sport. Not the insect...though come to think of it, I know almost nothing about the bug, either.)

(10) How to juggle, do a backflip, or whistle through my fingers. These are all physical acts that utterly escape me.

1 comment:

  1. now you have me thinking about the airplane phenomenon, how is it possible, seriously? jack is taking a flying lesson this weekend, maybe i can find out for us :)