I'm not saying my way is the right way to load a dishwasher, but it kind of is

I am the main dish washer in our house, in large part because I don't cook. I take dish cleanliness very seriously.

Thus, I have put a great deal of thought into how best to load our dishwasher so that every last cup, plate, bowl, and spoon is sparkling clean the next morning when I unload them, no matter what is smeared, stained, or caked upon them when they go in.

I run our dishwasher overnight, by the way. Do you do that? One of the last things I do before going to bed is making sure everything is loaded, then I pop in a detergent tablet, ensure there's plenty of that rinse liquid or whatever it's called in the little chamber, and start the 3-hour and 1-minute "normal" cycle with "extra dry" option on our LG dishwasher.

This routine works for me.

I recognize there are probably multiple ways to load a dishwasher to get everything clean, but being an American, I'm going to discount all other methods and instead assume that mine is superior. And that anyone not loading the dishwasher my way is some sort of communist not to be trusted.

Anyway, my approach is probably not uncommon. Plates and bowls go into the lower rack (plates on the left, bowls on the right). I don't put anything in the slot against the far left side of the rack, because water apparently doesn't get there and nothing placed in those spots gets especially clean.

The silverware thingy is also on that lower level, and it's pretty much self-explanatory. I put the business end of utensils (i.e., the bowl of spoons, the tines of forks, etc.) in first. Not sure if that's the prescribed way, but it's how I do it.

The upper level is mostly for glasses/mugs, but also for any dishwasher-safe plastic containers I don't particularly feel like hand washing. The right-most row is for tall things like Jared and Melanie's post-workout shake bottles. The wider middle row is there to accommodate any larger cups and smaller bowls that require more space.

There is also a pull-out top drawer where I place dirty spatulas, ladles, spoons, and other implements that would otherwise take up too much room in the rack below.

Everything needs to have direct exposure to the rotating water arm. If it's blocked in any way, it's not going to get clean.

There will always be things you have to hand wash. Suck it up and live with it. Do not force feed them into the dishwasher. My family needs reminding of this from time to time.

If your dishwasher is worth its weight in the gold you used to pay for it, everything should come out looking brand new.

This is, it should be noted, the only semi-useful advice I will ever give you on this blog.